The Spookiest Tales

Okay, how about this…every single time you come home, your dog has been replaced with a cat that has the same name. Spooky, right? This is going to have people on the edge of their seats, for sure, absolutely, definitely, it’s terrible.

Ugh…we can’t go home until we have at least ten ideas for upcoming episodes of ‘Spooky Tales For Brave Kids’, our premier show that’s really popular for some reason. Problem is, every single time we pitch something, the boss picks it apart and says it’s ‘too scary’ for kids. Too scary, for the scary show. So at the moment we have…one idea. Should be finished by midnight, in two weeks’ time.

Okay, every time you come home…you’ve had kitchen designer in Melbourne work on your home. I really think there’s something to this idea of your home changing without you realising it, because it’s subtle horror and the parents can’t complain very much. This is based on a true story, by the way: I once came home from a conference and found that my wife had gotten some kitchen renovation professionals in. I go in through the back door and into the kitchen, and when I walked into the room it was like walking into an alternate dimension. Like…I’d gone to the wrong house, but there was my wife in this renovated kitchen, and it seemed super wrong until I was told what had happened, and THEN there was a discussion about finances. Those are too horrific for kiddies, for sure.

I could pitch some financial tales to the boss, but something tells me those won’t get accepted. We have to hit the sweet spot of things that kids like, but things that kids find scary, but also things that kids do NOT find scary.

Alright, kitchen renovation. That’ll be the ultra-spooky but also tame theme. If this one gets accepted…eight more to go.